The Phone Call
Well it is another day, officially. All of you are sound asleep as I type this post, enjoying the comforts of your bed while I am stuck here at work. I was informed that I had to update my blog today and I spent a good part of my shift pondering what I was going to write about. I scanned countless news articles looking for something that truly sparked my interest but to no avail. It wasn’t until I answered a call from a former girlfriend that I had something to write about. I was even reluctant to post it in such a public forum. This was going to be one of those topics that I buried and possible never even discussed. But, I decided to post and chose this as a topic since it surprised me.
I actually talked to her twice, the first time caught me off guard. She claims that she was bored and knew that I would be awake for her to talk to. As most of you are aware I do not spend much time on the telephone with those of you that I enjoy talking to so the half an hour I spent on the phone with someone that I would rather have not talked to was shear torture. This conversation was for the most part the unpleasantries (not sure if that is spelled right, neither is Word) that you have with an ex since you talked last. How are you? How have you been doing? What are you up? The usuals I managed to make it though these with little problem when the opportunity finally presented itself I terminated the call (unfortunately not soon enough). I was a little befuddled by the call but not nearly as bad when she called back again about 10 minutes later. I thought the first thirty minutes was hell, boy was I mistaken. This time she wanted to talk about us and our former relationship. I knew I was in trouble when she said “I have a few questions I want to ask you” (guys, if this happens… RUN as fast as you possibly can). Question one was why did we break-up. I stuck to my original story that I told her in the fact that I didn’t have feelings for her anymore. I also tried to explain (looking back on it not sure why I bothered) my philosophy on relationships. I told her that I refuse to stay in a relationship if I cannot see myself with that person long term (5, 10+ years or married to). I told her that I didn’t see us being together in that capacity, which of course prompted another question, why not. And then the comment that we weren’t together (in her opinion) long enough for me to make that determination. Anyways, after that whole discussion she asked if we could try again. UUUUUUHHH… NO!!!! Sorry about your luck, I obviously didn’t like you enough then and not much has changed so… NO!!! My official response was something to the degree that my thoughts have not changed and would do no good to even try. She then proceeded to tell me that she had been thinking about me and trying to figure out what happened between us and her uncertainty in the way it ended was the reason she had not seriously dated since we separated and blah, blah, blah… still a NO! She asked me if I still had feelings for her (uh... NO) my response “Nothing beyond concern for your welfare” (which I have for most humans). This of coarse was not the answer she wanted to hear and asked if I had feelings for her then. Once again sticking to my guns I said I am not sure but the conclusion I came to was that I did not. Once again not the answer she wanted. I also had to deal with the typical questions like “Did I do something wrong?” and other routine break-up questions. I am sure there were more relationship (pointed) questions in there that I can’t recall at the moment… I am still in a slight state of shock. She then tried to change the topic of our discussion and have a normal conversation with me. How in the hell did she expect to carry on a normal conversation after those types of questions. We all have the ability to relay our emotions though the tone of our voice. Apparently my voice was that of someone aggravated/agitated. She picked up on this (congrats for her) and asked if she had aggravated or pissed me off. Uhh.. lets think for a minute, an ex calls you up and ask you questions like those above, would it aggravate you? I told her that she was walking very close to that line and then we proceeded to terminate the phone call (thank God).
Why can’t I just be the typical male ass hole? If I could have filled that role this would not be an issue. Still in this conversation I couldn’t do it. I guess I will have to work on selective good naturedness. I am going to rap this up, I was just shocked my the conversation and the fact that she wants me back (that is an interesting feeling, even though I do not share her feelings). The question is why can’t I find someone that I could have the same feelings for?
Just as an aside for you grammar and spelling nuts, I am sure there are quite a few spots in here that you will cringe at. I think I might have even made up some words as I went along (since word doesn’t like a couple of them) but you will have to forgive me, the words came quickly as I typed.
Wow… that was fun. I almost wish that would have been on a recorded line!
- Larry
I actually talked to her twice, the first time caught me off guard. She claims that she was bored and knew that I would be awake for her to talk to. As most of you are aware I do not spend much time on the telephone with those of you that I enjoy talking to so the half an hour I spent on the phone with someone that I would rather have not talked to was shear torture. This conversation was for the most part the unpleasantries (not sure if that is spelled right, neither is Word) that you have with an ex since you talked last. How are you? How have you been doing? What are you up? The usuals I managed to make it though these with little problem when the opportunity finally presented itself I terminated the call (unfortunately not soon enough). I was a little befuddled by the call but not nearly as bad when she called back again about 10 minutes later. I thought the first thirty minutes was hell, boy was I mistaken. This time she wanted to talk about us and our former relationship. I knew I was in trouble when she said “I have a few questions I want to ask you” (guys, if this happens… RUN as fast as you possibly can). Question one was why did we break-up. I stuck to my original story that I told her in the fact that I didn’t have feelings for her anymore. I also tried to explain (looking back on it not sure why I bothered) my philosophy on relationships. I told her that I refuse to stay in a relationship if I cannot see myself with that person long term (5, 10+ years or married to). I told her that I didn’t see us being together in that capacity, which of course prompted another question, why not. And then the comment that we weren’t together (in her opinion) long enough for me to make that determination. Anyways, after that whole discussion she asked if we could try again. UUUUUUHHH… NO!!!! Sorry about your luck, I obviously didn’t like you enough then and not much has changed so… NO!!! My official response was something to the degree that my thoughts have not changed and would do no good to even try. She then proceeded to tell me that she had been thinking about me and trying to figure out what happened between us and her uncertainty in the way it ended was the reason she had not seriously dated since we separated and blah, blah, blah… still a NO! She asked me if I still had feelings for her (uh... NO) my response “Nothing beyond concern for your welfare” (which I have for most humans). This of coarse was not the answer she wanted to hear and asked if I had feelings for her then. Once again sticking to my guns I said I am not sure but the conclusion I came to was that I did not. Once again not the answer she wanted. I also had to deal with the typical questions like “Did I do something wrong?” and other routine break-up questions. I am sure there were more relationship (pointed) questions in there that I can’t recall at the moment… I am still in a slight state of shock. She then tried to change the topic of our discussion and have a normal conversation with me. How in the hell did she expect to carry on a normal conversation after those types of questions. We all have the ability to relay our emotions though the tone of our voice. Apparently my voice was that of someone aggravated/agitated. She picked up on this (congrats for her) and asked if she had aggravated or pissed me off. Uhh.. lets think for a minute, an ex calls you up and ask you questions like those above, would it aggravate you? I told her that she was walking very close to that line and then we proceeded to terminate the phone call (thank God).
Why can’t I just be the typical male ass hole? If I could have filled that role this would not be an issue. Still in this conversation I couldn’t do it. I guess I will have to work on selective good naturedness. I am going to rap this up, I was just shocked my the conversation and the fact that she wants me back (that is an interesting feeling, even though I do not share her feelings). The question is why can’t I find someone that I could have the same feelings for?
Just as an aside for you grammar and spelling nuts, I am sure there are quite a few spots in here that you will cringe at. I think I might have even made up some words as I went along (since word doesn’t like a couple of them) but you will have to forgive me, the words came quickly as I typed.
Wow… that was fun. I almost wish that would have been on a recorded line!
- Larry
| 05:17 
Oh yes a recorded line would have been priceless! I would have paid to hear this I think! I am sorry that you had to deal with it, however, it was good experience... ;) Women, are just hard to deal with sometimes... being a woman I can say this with out getting hurt ... Gentlemen I wouldn't attempt it!
Posted by
shes_a_sprite |
August 27, 2004 8:34 AM